My mother has seven brothers. Each one is a story in himself. Their families are even more interesting. One of my uncles, Uncle Hafeez, is a case in point. His wife, Aunty Jameela, comes from Lahore's inner-city. Sexy, beautiful, bouyant- she is a true Lahori Aunty. Her magical cooking skills and sweet honeyed manner of talking won the heart of my uncle at a young age, and he has been in love with her ever since. For some reason, Aunty Jeelo, as most of us call her, has always been preoccupied with conjugal matters and everything intimacy-related. Every time they came over, her conversation was dominated by a new upcoming wedding or some budding romance. No matter what the subject of conversation, she turned it around to emphasize the speed with which matters were developing between the two passionate souls. The build-up of each story, however, always ended up being this one sentence: ‘And of course, ji, the bedroom is also ready’. This would alarm my very middle-class, conventional mother’s ears, and she would try to change the subject, but Aunty Jeelo, in her way, would keep going on about the bedroom being all ready for the couple to enjoy their first night ever.
Now, many years later, I find myself in New York City, following my Aunty’s advice. Every time I pick up a new piece of furniture or artwork for my flat, I pay homage to my lovely Aunty Jeelo, who taught all of us that the most important thing in life was to get the bedroom ready for your sweet first night. My wedding is fast approaching, and today, on the corner of 54th and 2nd, I saw a rare Mughal art piece. I shrieked, the old man selling this piece just leapt at me, ‘How much?’, I said, ‘100$’, he said. ‘70$’, I said, ‘done’, he said. We ran, here and there, together, looking for cash. Him chasing me, and I a bit shaken. Suddenly, I thought, ‘my bank account will weep.’ I turned around and as I was about to say, ‘sorry, I can’t buy it like this’, my sweet, Aunt Jeelo appeared and said, ‘But get it for your bedroom, you fool’. I marched into the deli and got some cash out and gave him the 70$ for this art piece. I am sure Aunty Jeelo will be so proud of me. My bedroom now looks happier and classier.
Akbar the Great and his courtiers are already blessing me and my husband-to-be.
