Today, I ran into Zohran Mamdani on the New York City subway. I was about to ask him for a selfie and an autograph, but the moment I approached him, he seemed to know who I was. He had already been briefed on the matter concerning me and EN. Not only that, it turns out that he was recruited as a covert flying monkey three years ago.
We started to talk, and he began fishing for my responses to ‘Do I know his friend ( other flying monkey names)? and ‘I have just come from France or DC’, and named some other cities. In short, he was giving a major stalker vibe. I was quick, thanks to the ongoing training and gave him a plan for my wedding(s), with a drooping mouth, he turned around and said, ‘Bitch, one day we will get you’. At this point, I decided to follow him and his team to Hell’s Kitchen, where they would brief the city. I was told that I am not invited, since I must RSVP to the email sent exactly at 3.38 pm. I was too scared to do so, knowing this could mean only two things: Ezra or no Ezra- and as my little mind was doing this maths, the assistant turned around and said, ‘It is up to you, we will be discussing the policies for the next four years, which would mean this month, this summer, fall, and winter.’ And as he began to list the dates and projects connected to it, my head began to spin even more. ‘In the next four years, we will be taking a super progressive approach, ’ he said gleefully, ‘ We will be focusing on abortion rights, but also creating more babysitting centers, improving city dance halls, along with creating more prayer and meditation spaces, just turning the city into one big farmland ’. I started to scream, and in my hysteria, I looked at him and said, ‘Is this really what you will be focusing on?’ And he looked at me, ‘Yeah, the city’s top priority is to crack this case’, as he pointed in my direction. Unable to make sense, I looked here and there, but everyone around us was looking at me like I had lost my mind.
I knew once again I had been caught red-handed, but somehow I was still free. Perhaps the new mayor will be able to take on this case for the city and conclude it. I wanted to ask him about laws around excessive gang-stalking, cyber crimes, blackmailing, and extortion. But I realize that since my love life has become a state-level concern, perhaps I should let New York vote on this matter. As Zohran was about to leave, I went up to him and whispered into his ear, “Please say hi to your mother, I just showed one of her films in my class”.‘MY MOTHER !!!’ He looked at me and said, “Ah, you and your dreams of a Monsoon Wedding, whether I am the Mayor or not, New York will never let you two get married”.
Sad, I came home to my midnight panic calls to random men, and lots of dirty movies.
NYC Mayoral Election: November 4, 2025
My Wedding Day: Every Friday of every week